quantum dots; nano science.

ATTN: Men of the world

swoz:

sushiandpie:

hulkling:

When feminists (regardless of gender) call you out for posting something fucked-up, it’s not an affront to you, it’s a call to be a better man. GET OVER IT

specifically its not an affront to your GENDER, its a correction to you as an individual. lets not even say “be a better man,” its be a “better homo sapien”

Implying it’s not OK to be a man, but OK to be a feminist. Neat.

Context kids.

Sooshi’s right, because while this is something I view a lot coming from men, that certain doesn’t mean they’re the only people who get called out for saying something discriminatory/anti-feminist. People of all genders are capable of making statements supporting internalized anti-feminism, and part of stopping that is to step back, analyze what would cause you to say something like that, and pledge to be a better human being.

Because, let’s be honest, slut-shaming, the virgin myth, the glass ceiling, and other such concepts don’t just hurt women/femmes, they hurt people of all genders and therefore, all of humanity.

Thanks for that addition, Morgan :)

"Gamers get hella uncomfortable over male sexuality too. Can you imagine a “good male character who just happens to be wearing sexually exploitative outfits because he’s ok with his masculinity?” Constantly has the camera pan lovingly over his asscrack and firm glutes, and big ole dangly ballsack that is totes sweaty from all this MMA and soldiering. Time to hit the showers, and do you, personally, think it’s ok to have a long slow pan up the dude’s package (indiscreetly hidden in a jock of course), to his chiseled physique and erect nipples (pierced). He’s not even a Bond-esque confident man, he’s basically a weird Bowie caricature that’s constantly having near-dickslips in every single cinematic as the completely nonsexualized female characters do their business of being gruff and shooting dudes and advancing the plot. Finally, at the end he falls in love (out of nowhere) and/or is killed by the big baddie."

inboxwrites:

sachehund:

~*~buttercream dreams~*~: Angry bitch coming through.

sergeantbitchtits:

mikkynga:

melanquolia:

Somebody commented on a Veronica/M!Courier prompt with something along the lines of,

“You know she wanted to ride him like a pony.”

Uh. Pardon?

Now, if there’s something I don’t particularly agree with on kinkmemes anywhere, I can (usually) turn a blind eye, but given that…

woa…

i just want to say

so it’s ok turn gay some characters it’s ok  but turn them straight it’s bad?

^^^

come on a lot of you have no problem with boone suddenly turning gay and sticking his pene up the courier’s bum for convenience but the minute it’s the other way around OH NO 

DISCLAIMER: This whole discussion/fill affects things about me personally, so I am likely to a) repeat myself, b) ramble, c) be really flippin angry through all of this. Please be warned ahead of time that I don’t take this subject lightly. I will also probably be going back in and editing, but whatever.

That said …Are you guys serious? Like actually serious?

Did you even bother to read the context? At all? Or the fill itself?

Furthermore: do you have any earthly idea what the ‘dick a lesbian straight’ thing has done over the years? Are you even remotely aware of the fact that lesbians by and large have to fight tooth and nail for their preference to be accepted as more than a passing phase, even more so than most? That even when they are portrayed in regular media, they’re still subjecting to straightwashing, whereas even most gay male characters are not?

Let me make this painfully clear: the fill in question was an insidious slop pile of tropes, spanning from ‘you can’t get from a lesbian relationship what you can get from a straight one’ to ‘women are too dumb to masturbate.’ Look, I don’t normally bother to go out of my way to bash on what pops up on the kmeme. I’ll state what I don’t particularly like in pairings and motifs, but I have never outright attacked a single fill. You wanna comb through my entire tumblr to find an entry of that nature? You’ll come away finding that it never happens.

In this case, I’m making an exception.

Why, you ask? Why not just go with the flow, ride it out?

Well, let’s start with this: Fill title happily implies that you’re not a real woman ‘til you’ve had a dick in you.

Fill content just makes it worse. Nothing else on the meme has made me as angry as this fill has. Like legitimately, outright, spitting fire angry, and personally offended, besides. I was in a three-year relationship with another woman that I count as pretty fucking legitimate, and this piece of shit comes along and reminds me that there’s a ton of people out there who think it was a worthless passing phase. I’m goddamn tired of seeing that, and it’s clear some of you have no idea how dehumanizing that can feel.

So yeah, I’m gonna get upset “over a video game.” I’m going to get upset “over a stupid fanfiction.”

Let’s run through the egregious errors AGAIN, though, shall we? This fill is written by an epic doucheweasel; it’s a screed that reads like it’s written by a guy who only wishes he could seduce a lesbian, and get her to realize everything she’s been missing by denying the power of a wang. It implies that she’s not capable of having a healthy sex life on account of who/what she is. I mean, sure, obviously, a woman with another woman is incapable of figuring out how to perform oral sex, or kiss, or god knows what else. Also, apparently at age 28, Veronica has no idea how to masturbate to orgasm, and needs a man to show her how it’s done. We need the power of cock to rectify this, stat.

Fuck this fill. In the bad way.

Women have been subjected to extreme sexual violence because of this kind of mindset. You should be aware of that. Never mind the fact that their lives, their loves, their everything romantic is pretty much undermined to the umpteenth degree. 

So really, hijacking the conversation to do the ‘lets all hold hands and love all ships’ song and dance on this one is not going to wash. You’re missing the point, when there is a point to be made. The fact that it was used as a platform to talk about how every batshit crazy ship is okay is just shy of infuriating. I don’t fucking care about batshit crazy ships. I’m more than happy to discuss it in any other forum, or, hell, even say: go ahead and ship whatever the hell you want. But when a fill like this pops up, guess what? It’s going to get coverage. What comes out of creative fiction, and in all forums of life, *matters*. Saying it doesn’t is people giving themselves a license to shrug off any and all offensive mistakes, and that’s all it does.

This is a bigger problem than ‘just a story,’ or ‘just a video game.’ This is reinforcement of an absolutely toxic trope, and whenever it comes up, it’s been one that’s gotten shrugged off more often than not. You want us to shut the fuck up about it and have a feel-good session? Then how about you stick up for lesbian relationships as often as you do for gay male relationships. ‘Cause, you know, hey, if the problem goes away, we have nothing to complain about. If the toxic environment ceases to be, women who’ve dealt with this might not be instantly sickened by seeing this sort of playtime-adventure pop up.

But I’d still be absolutely grossed out by the way in which it was presented, and ONCE AGAIN: ignoring that to have a broader discussion is hijacking the original intent, missing the point egregiously, and being disingenuous. It also makes the respondents seem a lot more self-conscious about their own creative preferences than need be. This is not necessary. Please take that discussion elsewhere.

And, seriously, don’t tl;dr. That’s bullshit. Don’t pretend this is a conversation about the conventions of ‘oh so it’s okay to do (this) but it’s not okay to do (this) now?’ This is a conversation about something specific, something that made my guts do flip flops. All in all, I’m cool with live and let live. In this instance, I am not.

Let’s make this clear, one more time:

This has nothing to do with the kinkmeme as a whole.

This is not a conversation about IC/not-IC.

This is not a conversation about pairings or their legitimacy.

This is a conversation about a genuinely hurtful, and COMMON belief that exists surrounding lesbians in fiction.

Are we clear now?

Let me love you.

This is why we are using this story as a jump-off point into a straightwashing discussion. Not because MY SHIP WARS, not because lesbians are untouchable in regards to writing preference-play, but because the misogyny and homophobia in this particular story are peak crazy.

Fandom people should read all of this. Every single word. I’ve felt this way for a long time about pretty much every straight!Veronica fill…

The 1880s with a ginger twist: Terms for Understanding Self, Feelings, and Relationships: Version 2 »

outlawroad:

asexual - a person who does not experience sexual attraction; many asexuals still experience romantic attraction and identify as heteromantic, homoromantic, biromantic, or panromantic

demisexual - person who only experiences secondary sexual attraction as a result of emotional…

This whole post is so good. It’s so comforting to me knowing that there are whole groups of people who feel these ways about attraction, and not just me!

"

Men who want to flirt with women have to realize: Women live in a state of continual vigilance about sexual safety. It’s like having a mild case of hay fever that never goes away. It’s not debilitating. You’re not weak. You’re not afraid. You just suck it up and get on with your life. It’s nothing that’s going to stop you from making discoveries, or climbing mountains, or falling in love. Sometimes you can almost forget about it. It doesn’t mean it’s not there, subtly sucking your energy. You learn to avoid situations that make it worse and seek out conditions that make it better.

If a female stranger is wary around you, it is not because she suspects you are a rapist, or that all men are rapists. It’s because a general level of circumspection is what vigilance requires. Don’t take it personally.

If this frustrates you, try to remember that women are blamed for lapsed vigilance. If a woman does get raped, everyone rushes to see where she let her guard down. Was she drinking? Was she alone? Was she wearing a short skirt? Did she go to a strange man’s room for coffee at 4am?

A woman must be seen to be vigilant as well as be vigilant. If she is deemed insufficiently vigilant, she will be at least partly blamed for any sexual violence that befalls her. If she’s regarded as downright reckless, that “evidence” can be used to completely exonerate her rapist. If it comes down to a he said/she said dispute over whether sex was consensual, as so many rape cases do, the dispute becomes a referendum on whether the woman seems like the sort of reckless person who would have sex with a stranger.

If a woman does go back to a strange man’s hotel room at 4am, even if she only wants a coffee and conversation, she’s more or less given him the power to rape her. No jury is going to believe she went up there for anything but sex. So, don’t be surprised if a stranger reacts badly to that suggestion.

"

"There’s an important difference between saying “I don’t enjoy that” or “I don’t understand what draws people to that” and saying “that sexual act is bad/sick/weird.” When someone expresses an objection to a sexual practice, there’s often a theme of judging the people who do it and of saying that there’s something wrong with them for enjoying it. Even if it’s not intentional, that judgment is still likely to come out."

Lee Pace is God.: Gray-Asexuality »

Asexuality and sexuality are not black and white; some people identify in the gray (spelled “grey” in some countries) area between them. People who identify as gray-A can include, but are not limited to those who:

• do not normally experience sexual attraction, but do experience it…

NSFW: Please take the Asexual Awareness Week Asexy Census! »

acesecrets:

Asexual Awareness Week (October 23-29) has created a census for asexual, demisexual and grey-a identified people.

To be scientifically representative, the census needs at least 500 responses. If this happens the results can go towards future academic research into asexuality,…

So I’ve had this sitting in my drafts box for a while and figured I’d finally touch it up and make a post about something very important to me:

cardinal-bitchface:

Virginity.

More accurately, the important factor to me concerning virginity is that I believe virginity is not important at all. I am not here to bash people who do believe it’s important, but I do have a problem with people who judge others for not having the same standards as them, and that goes both ways. Virgins shame non-virgins, call them “sluts,” tell them they should have waited, call them useless, etc. Non-virgins shame virgins, call them clueless, idiots, and claim they know nothing about sex and sometimes, about the world. I’ve experienced judgement from both sides, and I’m not saying my experiences encompass all experiences of all people, but this is my opinion.

Read More

Preach.